23 Popular Couples’ Sleeping Positions and What They Mean

Key Takeaways: 

• Some of the most common couples’ sleeping positions include spooning, back-to-back, and face-to-face.
• The way you sleep with a partner may reflect your relationship, but as long as you’re both comfortable, your sleep positions could suggest mutual understanding.
• The best couple’s sleep position should accommodate both partners’ comfort, support, and intimacy needs.

Some people believe that you can learn a lot about a person from their preferred sleep position. If that’s the case, then what do different couples’ sleeping positions say about you and your partner?

Relationship and body language experts may suggest that your sleeping position is tied to your personality, and couples sleeping position psychology reflects the current state of your relationship — whether consciously or subconsciously.

Keep reading to explore 23 couples’ sleeping positions and what they could say about your relationship, plus how they may reflect on your personality traits.

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23 Most Common Relationship Sleeping Positions + Their Meanings

Whether you sleep on your back without touching or fall asleep curled against each other, different relationship sleeping positions can provide key insights into the state of your relationship, according to relationship experts.

One study by University of Hertfordshire Professor Richard Wiseman surveyed 500 couples and how they sleep to evaluate the connection between sleep positions and relationship health. It found that 94% of couples who sleep while touching their partner are happy with their relationships, compared to 68% of couples who sleep without touching.¹

From strengths and fears to stressors and feelings of safety, different sleeping positions could indicate how you and your partner feel about each other — though it’s more likely that it simply reflects what positions you prefer. For example, tossing and turning may simply mean you can’t get comfortable in bed — not necessarily that your relationship is causing you stress.

Let’s take a look at the potential meanings behind some of the best couple sleeping positions below.

1. The Spooning Position

Meaning: One partner hugging the other from behind

The spoon position entails having one person (the “big spoon”) hug another person (the “little spoon”) from behind in a protective stance. 

This intimate position is one of the most common couples’ sleeping positions, especially for couples in the early stages of their relationship. Couples who spoon likely put a lot of importance on physical touch and enjoy being close to each other.

2. The Chasing Spoon

Meaning: Spooning with space between partners

Unlike in the classic spoon, there is a bit of space between partners in the chasing spoon position. Usually, the little spoon will lay on one side of the bed in a log or fetal position while the big spoon adjusts their position to "chase" them.

The little spoon may prefer more space to themselves when sleeping; they may be a hot sleeper wanting to keep cool, or they may just like having more room to sprawl. Big spoons who reach for their partner in this position likely respect their partner’s needs but still want to maintain physical contact.

As long as both partners communicate about their needs and preferences, this position can be a comfortable compromise.

3. The Loose Spoon

Meaning: Spooning with less physical contact

The loose spoon is very similar to the classic spoon but with less contact and more space between partners. Couples who spoon loosely may realize, whether subconsciously or not, that the quality of their sleep is just as valuable as closeness and touch.

4. The Separate Fetal Position 

Meaning: Both partners curled in the fetal position

Sleeping in the fetal position is extremely common. If you and your partner prefer to sleep curled up but separate, that could imply comfort and security, especially if you’re facing each other.

When both partners face away from each other, it’s not necessarily a sign there’s trouble in paradise. Sleeping in this position could mean mutual trust and understanding of each other’s needs if both partners find the position comfortable.

5. Fetal Position Cuddle

Meaning: Spooning with both partners in the fetal position

This position means both partners are curled up and touching, with one person playing the “big spoon” role to wrap around the other. This intimate position often indicates a strong physical connection and emotional closeness.

6. Face-to-Face

Meaning: Facing each other on your sides while touching

Sleeping face-to-face with light physical contact — touching hands, feet, or even elbows — suggests like-mindedness and comfort between partners. You may incline your foreheads towards each other or drape your arms over each other in a loose embrace.

This position is only possible for side sleepers comfortable lying on their left and right sides. Some couples may consider switching which side of the bed they sleep on to make this position work.

7. The Face-to-Face Without Touching

Meaning: Side sleepers who face inwards with no contact

In this sleeping position, couples face the center of the bed without touching each other. The amount of space between you can vary depending on what size mattress you get and how close you like to be to your partner.

Sleeping in this position suggests that both partners value each other and recognize the need for personal space and independence.

8. Face-to-Face Hug

Meaning: Cuddling for side sleepers

If you sleep intertwined or cuddling facing each other — also known as "the lover's knot" — you and your partner are likely very close and find comfort in constant touch. New couples may gravitate towards positions like this and the classic spoon to foster intimacy and connection overnight, but it’s a fairly uncommon way to sleep.

9. The Butt-to-Butt

Meaning: Side sleeping while facing away but touching

Sleeping butt-to-butt is one of the most popular sleeping positions among couples, suggesting that both partners feel at ease around each other and trust in the relationship.

10. Back-To-Back Without Touching

Meaning: No contact between side sleepers facing away from each other

Also called the “liberty lovers” position, couples who sleep in this position face opposite directions without touching at all. 

If there is little space between the couple, it could mean that they're comfortable and secure enough to sleep apart. It is possible that the two people involved just don’t enjoy the warmth of cuddling up under blankets together.

Every couple is different, and if you both agree that the position is comfortable, then the amount of space between you may simply mean you respect each other’s needs and feel secure in your relationship.

11. The Weighted Blanket

Meaning: One partner lies on top of the other

Lying under a weighted blanket can help you feel calm, safe, and snug, but using your partner as a top layer instead challenges the idea of how heavy weighted blankets should be. For cozy couples, this position fosters closeness, though it may be uncomfortable for the person lying directly on the bed. 

If one partner feels soothed with weight on top of them but the other partner finds this position uncomfortable, opting for a cozy weighted blanket could be the perfect solution.

12. The Cradle

Meaning: One partner rests their head on the other

Also called "the nuzzle," this position involves one partner laying their head on the other's chest, usually with their legs entangled.

This position may indicate a sense of protection and security between the cuddling couple. Couples who have just entered or rekindled their relationships may prefer this position.

13. The Hand Hold

Meaning: Back sleepers who hold hands

Lying on your backs while holding or gently touching each other’s hands is also known as the “paper doll” position. Couples who sleep like this likely balance having a strong connection with setting productive boundaries, achieving a healthy blend of physical intimacy and personal comfort.

14. The Leg Hug

Meaning: Individual positions with legs intertwined

Of the different couples’ sleeping positions, the leg hug is one of the most flexible. Couples fall into their own individual positions but keep their legs entwined to some level.

If you're tightly intertwined, it could mean you have a strong emotional and physical connection, and a loose leg hug may suggest a desire for closeness with a mutual respect for individual space.

15. The Loose Knot

Meaning: Physical contact between different sleep styles

The loose knot has an appropriately loose definition, describing couples who sleep in different positions while maintaining some physical contact. Like the hand-holding position, partners who prefer a loose knot may value independence and personal comfort.

A variation of this position is the unraveling knot, in which you start the night close to your partner, often intertwined, then gradually separate to get more comfortable. An unraveling knot suggests that, even if you’re a restless sleeper, you both value physical intimacy and want to feel close to one another as you fall asleep.

If both partners frequently move around in their sleep, your mattress may slide around, especially if it’s not the correct size for your bed frame. Changing your sleep style may help keep you both comfortable with minimal disruptions if this is the case.

16. The Head-On-Shoulder

Meaning: Overlapping back sleepers using one as a pillow

Also known as the “shingles” sleeping position, this position has both partners sleeping on their backs, with one partner resting their head on the other’s shoulder.

It may show a high level of camaraderie with a strong sense of understanding. For some couples, this position may indicate a feeling of security, where one partner feels safe and protected by the other.

17. The Cliffhanger

Meaning: Side sleepers who cling to the edges of the bed 

Couples who sleep on the opposite edges of the bed fall into the cliffhanger position, defined by the amount of space between partners. Content couples with healthy boundaries who value having plenty of space to sleep may adopt the cliffhanger position to get deeper sleep.

18. The Bed Hog

Meaning: One partner takes up too much space

In this position, one partner lies on their back with their limbs splayed, taking up most of the mattress space, a position known as the “starfish.” Due to the lack of space, their partner takes a secondary role, often sleeping in the fetal position or with one leg dangling over the edge of the bed.

If you find yourself sprawling out and leaving little room for your partner, consider looking into bigger bed sizes to help improve your and your partner’s sleep quality.

19. The Starfish Cuddle

Meaning: Both partners sprawl while touching

Unlike the bed hog, the starfish cuddle position allows both sleepers to sprawl out while touching or overlapping limbs in some way. Because the starfish position requires ample space to stretch, the starfish cuddle is only comfortable on a large bed like the Alberta king bed so both partners can be comfortable.

20. The Double Stomach Sleeper

Meaning: Both partners sleep on their stomachs

As the name suggests, this position is when you and your partner fall asleep on your stomachs. Sleeping on your stomach isn’t advisable because it puts the spine in an unnatural position, which could increase your vulnerability to pain in the lower back, neck, shoulder, and hips.

21. Double Soldier

Meaning: Both partners sleep on their backs without touching

Sometimes dubbed the “toy soldiers” position, the double soldier is a straightforward arrangement where both partners lie on their backs, hands at their sides, without touching.

Sleeping in this position eliminates the possibility of cuddling, but it’s likely that both you and your partner simply prefer independently lying on your backs. If you want more contact, you can try holding hands in this position or cuddling at other times of the day.

22. The Great Wall Of Pet(s)

Meaning: Sleeping with a pet between partners

Many people treat their pets like family, which means sharing their beds with them — even if it means sacrificing comfort. Putting your pet in the middle of the bed likely reflects just how much you love your pets and want to keep them close.

23. The Pillow In Between

Meaning: Sleeping with a pillow between partners

Sleeping with a pillow between couples may seem like a physical representation of distance, but couples who sleep like this may just need that barrier for comfort.

For combination sleepers or anyone prone to flailing in their sleep, this pillow wall can preserve personal space and prevent unintentional contact or sleep disruptions. Hugging pillows for side sleepers can also be more comfortable, promoting good spinal alignment.

This sleep position might suggest a healthy need for independence and a mutual understanding of what you need to sleep well.

Is There a Link Between Sleep Positions And Personality Traits?

Your sleep position primarily represents what feels comfortable, not who you are. It’s not a proven sleep fact that you can conclusively infer something about someone’s personality based on how they sleep, but some sleep psychologists believe there is a link.²

British professor Chris Idzikowski, Director of the Sleep Assessment and Advisory Service and the Edinburgh Sleep Centre, surveyed over 1,000 adults to determine whether this was true. His key findings about different sleep positions included: 

• The fetal position could indicate shyness and sensitivity.
• The log position might suggest a sociable person who trusts strangers.
• The soldier position may reflect that a person is quiet, reserved, and likes to be in control.

But Idzikowski’s research is not without limitations. The findings weren’t replicated with a second group of participants, and since survey participants reported on their own personality traits and sleep position, the risk of bias was high.

In most cases, how you prefer to sleep simply represents the position that allows you to fall asleep and stay asleep. 

Get a Good Night’s Sleep With Purple Regardless of Your Sleep Position

No matter which of these couples’ sleeping positions you and your partner prefer, it’s important to foster connection and communication with your partner to ensure everyone’s needs are met. Be sure to choose the best mattress size for your relationship to keep you both comfortable regardless of your preferred sleep positions.

Everyone deserves a good night's sleep, whether that means sleeping intertwined with your partner or in separate beds. Purple offers a variety of mattresses that are great for all kinds of couples so you can enjoy each other’s company without disruptions and sleep soundly every night.

Get Your Best Night’s Sleep With Purple

With our adaptive GelFlex® Grid, Purple queen size mattresses keep couples cool and isolate motion so you and your partner can sleep well.

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